SEX, SIGHTS, AND CONVERSATION: WHY MEN AND WOMEN CAN’T COMMUNICATE


SEX, SIGHTS, AND CONVERSATION: WHY MEN AND WOMEN CAN’T COMMUNICATE

       - Deborah Tannen

In her article “Sex, Sights, and Conversation: Why Men and Women Can’t Communicate,” Deborah Tannen focuses on gender differences in the use of language and on the frustration these differences cause when women and men converse. She starts with an anecdote about a woman and a man who are lost. The woman wants to ask for directions and the man doesn’t.
Tannen outlines the major differences in the ways females and males use language. Beginning in early childhood, girls learn to use language to share feelings with their female friends and to create a sense of closeness. Boys, on the other hand, learn to use language to establish their independence and compete with their male friends. By spending more time, boys preserve their independence and self-respect.
Tannen goes on to give several examples of how these difficult expectations about the functions of language continue into adulthood and cause problems. Her examples involve conversations such as the one in the opening anecdote and how women use language to create intimacy and harmony and men to enhance their status and challenge others.
A woman wants to talk about everything that has happened during the day. But a man does not want to do so. If she talks about a problem, he offers a solution. Her solution has made the talk short, so she feels unhappy. Actually, she talked to make relation better. He also feels unhappy because she is not interested in his solution. When a woman talks about her problem to another woman, she explores the problem and expresses understanding to offer a similar experience. All these responses express support and bring them closer. Men think that criticism is constructive, but women consider it as a challenge. They only want suggestions and support. Men present the story when they think it is proper to tell, but women consider it ad disloyalty. Men are silent at home but women are not. At meetings, men speak most.
Tannen concludes her article by stressing the need for female and male partners to recognize that they often converse in different ways. If women and men become more aware of these “cross-cultural” they will stop assuming that their own ways of speaking are correct and that those of their partners are wrong, and they will make the small changes necessary to improve communication.


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Questions and Answers of ‘My Mother Never Worked’

  Questions and Answers of ‘My Mother Never Worked’ Comprehension 1.      What kind of work did Martha Smith do while her children were growing up? List     some of the chores she performed.        Martha Smith worked very hard at raising her children, doing farm chores, and               maintaining a household, but she did not work outside the home for pay-the only              kind of work recognized by the government.   2.      Why aren’t Martha Smith’s survivors entitled to a death benefit when their mother dies?     According to the government, Martha Smith is not eligible for a death benefit because she was never employed.   3.      How does the government define work?       The government defines work as an activity performed for compensation.   ...
Read more

Questions and Answers of 'The Case Against Air Conditioning'

Image
              Questions and Answers of 'The Case Against Air Conditioning ' Comprehension 1.      What does Cox think is wrong with air conditioning? Ans: Cox says that air conditioning uses a lot of energy; running air conditioners burns fossil fuels, which emits greenhouse gases that raise global temperatures, which in turn increases the need for air conditioning. He believes that air conditioning should be used more sparingly. 2.     According to Cox, what would be the results of a largely “A.C.-free Washington” (3)? Does the scenario he outlines apply only to Washington, DC? Only to urban areas? Does it apply to other parts of the countries as well? Ans: cox says that reduced air conditioning use in Washington would result in more flexible work schedules (business, including governmental ones, closing and adjusting for heat), renovation for buildings to better accommodate heat, decreased use of heat-gen...
Read more

Summary of 'The Case Against Air Conditioning

  The Case Against Air Conditioning The author’s message is that A.C. keeps us inside and away from interacting with one another. We shouldn’t be trapped inside everyday but we should be out and about to enjoy the world around us. This essay is about why Washington/America should stop using air conditioners in everyday life with the expectation of hospitals, archives, and cooling centers. The author supports his argument by providing examples of wat Washington would look like without air conditioners at work, at home, and around town. Cox’s starts out with using modern day examples of people using air conditioning to beat the Heat and why it is bad. Cox’s wants readers to turn down, turn off, or just complete eliminate air conditioning use. He believes that it will benefit us by making neighborhoods more friendly, laws more lax, and climate change less of an issue. People in Washington didn’t have to experience extreme heat because their houses were equipped with air condi...
Read more